i am jack's undaunting sense of horrific flashback.


well class starts tomorrow. back to fun with Magister Marcus. we all adored the Magistra, but Mark isnt going to make us do shit. no one is demanding otherwise. im sure hell have assignments... probably some quizes too... [he mentioned vocab is still important {bwahahaha}]. but tomorrow marks the begining of the end really. come may something er other, i will be done. hopefully on my way far, far away from this wretched place. while i did learn a few things here... aside from latin, bits of hebrew and a miserable failure of spanish. some things really just never meshed well with me. and i cant honestly say without remorse of heart, that im going to miss the university of iowa. i might miss being a student. getting information on subjects no one does. being nameless in a group, being expected to be worthless to society. but ive spent too long here. for far, far too little. i am no different than when i walked into the doors of Phillips Hall, that first morning on campus. back when i actually carried a map with me to jog my mind how to find that North Hall, that was hidden from view... and now i carry it because i have no clue what the hell the names of some of these buildings are anymore. campus has changed. kids have changed. and all for the worse. ive seen some very bright individuals fail out of this school; ive witnessed idiots graduate with honors; and ive seen cheaters out score me in plain view. at times, this place brought me to my knees... on the bring of academic ruin, to financial disdain... and even to the ends of my own sanity. but tomorrow is the first of the last.

when i was a kid, i used to get anxious about school. while i never wanted to start classes and leave home; i never wanted to miss a chance to be there either. i remember being quite a problem child in 1st grade.... how much i hated school. i hated the teacher. the kids hated me. i had no friends. they all made fun of me. they would say shit to me. throw shit at me. take my things and hide them or break them. and i never cried. i never cried for myself. so many times i felt like i was in that same mold again here at the university. i hate the school. i hate the teachers. the kids truely hate me. i have few true friends. theyve never understood me here. and they tried so hard to pieces of me away from myself. and i wont forgive this place for that. ive still never cried for myself. and i will not weep for this place either.

cheers to the last semester.

VALE! VALE!