A little bit of nothing

I'm posting this from my iPad. Yes. I am that guy now. I will say that bloggers app is terrible for iPad and only mediocre for the iPhone. I've used it off and inform a while on my phone to some success; but its downright awful on the iPad. The humongous, highly detailed screen is useless when viewed like this. And stretched to its double size proportion it isn't winning any other beauty contests either. It's unfortunate at best. But I'm slowly delving into the world of iPad. It's clumsy at times but it's so refreshingly simple and elegant for about 90% of computing needs that I don't notice the flaws so much now. Hopefully I'll find a descent microphone option that is iPad happy to begin work on the podcast on the road. For now its a toy. And a simple way to view the web without a wait time. Typing. Typing can wait for a real keyboard though.

Adventures In Wet Shaving, Update

Since so many people have been asking me, through the typical quiet channels, I thought I might give a bit of an update on my adventures in wet shaving.  More importantly are my long form thoughts on the mechanical aspects.

 

What makes it wet?  New-comers like me may opine that it’s the blood.  That makes it sound like torture to most people.  Its half true.  Its not called wet shaving because of that, but in the beginning there has been a fair amount of bleeding!  Its wet because you need to use water and lather much more frequently than most disposable blades require, and nearly no electric razor on the market requires it [or functions correctly if you do use it!].  So already the key is quality and quantity of lather.  Coming from a disposable system mindset, gel based bullshit was ubiquitous for this purpose.  Getting past the garbage aerosol scent and reddi-whip appearance of Barbasol products, and graduating to the generic gels, gave the best results.  In fact, my favorite non gel form, made at one time Edge as a cream in an apothecary type tube, would have been my only trial in wet shaving… the rest of it is awful.  The gel products create a low friction point [good], but extremely thin and viscous.  Why?  Because they clog the 5 blade razors too quickly [bad].   I need to lower the point of friction, but not to nothing.  Some of that friction is important, I’ve found.

Friction in multi blade throw-away’s comes from two places: poor lubrication across multiple blades and cutting surfaces, and poor technique.  Both of those points, on a quality edge wet shaving system will gouge seams in your face like the ones on your jeans!  Since I’m relying on only one edged surface to cut with, the ability of the shaving creams or lathers must not run or flush too quickly from the surface; and since its only one edge, clogging between blades isn’t of any concern.  Granted, this razor will clog as well, but it takes considerably more material [wider blades, and more space available in the razor head], and you are constantly flushing the head of the razor with water to clear away the build up of lather from the non cutting surfaces.  As a down side [of sorts], I’m using considerably more lather than I had with a 5-blade throw-away.  A tall can of Fusion Gel lasted me MONTHS [six maybe?] with daily use.  That’s ridiculous, and I realize that.  However using more of the gel product didn’t make a difference in performance: the gel product was still thin, would still clog very quickly in the cartridge, and it didn’t change my poor habits.  And with the advent of built in lubrication strips [note to reader: if dissipating friction was not an issue, why are manufacturers putting these on the cartridges? Because their gel products clog the cartridge, in the attempt to continually atomize the particles to lubricate the growing number of cutting surfaces.  So they include lubrication that does not leave residue to clog, but that still acts as a friction modifier to the gel system].  In short, the fewer the cutting surfaces, the less you need to worry about keeping each lubricated to relieve friction problems.

A bit more about the blades is important before I get to technique. The cutting edge is honed to exacting specifications by these manufacturers, and ideally, the edge cuts as clean of a pass on one face as another.  So why doesn’t work like that?  Piss poor technique, and product engineering.  As the material the edge is made out of is thinned, and its composition is changed, the quality of the blade will change with it.  Softer material dulls quickly [rather, the edge folds and rolls or degrades against stronger materials], but harder / denser materials have less flexibility inherently.  Manufacturers must strike a balance to keep flexibility [to move with the round contours of the human face, and to stay some what forgiving when necessary], yet keep the edge honed to cut cleanly. 

Adding multiple blades became the fad, and it introduced thinner, flexible blades of softer material. Why? First and foremost, to sell more cartridges…  No shit.  As the edge dulls, you need to replace it, since it no longer cuts the hairs.  Seems simple, but people glaze past this point.  Part and parcel, adding multiple blades in a cartridge raised the price.  Now its about money, on recurring bases, balancing how quickly the edge dulls, multiplied by the price point of each sold cartridge unit, divided by the likelihood of the consumer to purchase replacement cartridges on a frequent recurrence.  But it also gives you the impression the blades weren’t flexible before; and in fact as a cartridge, they are less flexible now.  In the same idea as doubling up 2x4s to strengthen a wall, creating five layers of redundancy spanning a distance will always yield less flexibility than spanning the same distance with one substrate.  Each of the extra blades keeps you from bending and flexing, increasing rigidity.  The notion of rigidity is engineered into the cartridge because of the poor technique of the user! [I promise I’m coming to that point!]

So I’m using a single cutting edge, that is more flexible than its “modern” counterpart, that needs different lubrication demands [that are actually in my favor], how the hell am I cutting myself more often?  Its that poor technique.  [bingo]

Using the multi-blade disposables we fight friction with minimalist layers of lubrication [to keep from clogging the blades], on cartridges that are firm and moderately inflexible by comparison sake.  However, we introduce friction to combat its by product.  You push harder to over come the softer edges that dull faster on the multi blades, to get the same quality shave as the edge disintegrates.  Secondly you make fewer passes over skin because you have made the same pass 3 to 5 times with each cartridge movement.  The idea of a once and done solution.  That doesn’t work with a single blade.  As my blade flexes better, it will bend and skip over spots on my skin that are not completely flat [read: everywhere]. What I’m seeing in my bleeding pattern are many, small dabs of blood.  When I shaved and erred with cartridge razors I had deep cuts that bled and were wide.  Its clear that the force I was using on the cartridge systems made the cuts; and it’s the blade bouncing causing smaller pricks with the single edge.  My technique then became the issue, as I realized this.

I have always trusted in the cartridge razors’ motto: once and done.  Making one pass, or two if really necessary, is all it needed to get the job done.  With a single edge, I do need to make two or three passes.   But more importantly, I need to relube and lather up each time…. something I rarely did with cartridges.  Secondly, friction is important, but it doesn’t come from pressure.  Using hand pressure flattens the skin around [and in between blades] of a cartridge system.  On a single edge you will cut yourself deeply.  With a multi blade cartridge you are minimizing the pressure by distributing it across multiple points.  You don’t always cut yourself because it’s the same idea as the old circus bed of nails trick… however as the skin changes angles and is no longer flat, that’s when you bite hard… with excessive pressure behind a dulled edge, you do immense damage in the little vertical wrinkle under the nose and above the lip!   With the single edge, I need some friction to know I’m gaining traction and working with the skin, pulling it taunt under the blade; this pops the hairs up and keeps from ballooning skin up in front of the cutting edge. 

All of this takes time and forethought.   But as of 2 months into it, I will say, I have a much closer shave, that I can get two days out of with a single edge system, compared to the cartridge razors.  Secondly I can factor in the pricing as such:

Cartridge Razor Typical Expenditures:

1 - 2cartridge each week: 3.75 each
1 razor handle:  9.00 [good for a year or so]
1 can saving gel : 3.00
------------------------------------
in 60 days totals: 57.00

 

Straight Razor Blade Typical Expenditures:

1 blade each week: .30 each [in 50pk quantity]
1 stypic pencil:  1.97 [good for years?]
1 cake shaving crème: 1.99 [good for 6 months]
1 shaving brush:   20.00 [good for years]
1 razor handle:  25.00 [good for decades]
----------------------------------------------
in 60 days totals:  51.36

 

Also note… that while I do have to purchase and use more items, they are cheaper, and they do last considerably longer in the wet shaving system.  In a years time, I should be somewhere in the 30% to 50% price equivalency of cartridge shaving.  It does add up.  But I have learned that much so far.

 

S

Without the nicks and cuts of a blade

The first experience of wet shaving bears grizzly fruit. I can't lie. In my absence, I've been doing alot of things. All of them revolve around making changes in life. Now that I'm back from California, I thought I'd try out my new toy. The Edwin Jagger, chromed double edge safety razor was had for under 30 dollars on amazon. So begins a new way of doing business!

People ask me about all kinds of things, and facial hair is rarely one of them. So I thought I'd expand beyond the obvious question I get [why do you have brown hair and a red beard], to step out on a limb about the mess of straight razor shaves. I made the leap for several reasons.

1. Its far, far cheaper to the safety razor multi blade craze. I've used several different electric razors over the years, that range from 10 to 150 dollars, and all of which gave moderate to terrible quality of shaves. The best shaves I've done myself, have been with multi blade disposable safety models [read: Gillette Mach 3 and Fusion errr Mach 5]. Consider the cost per shave of the electric high-ends to be nearly a buck, and the cost per shave of the Mach'ing Birds to be about 3 dollars. Enter the double edge buckshot, somewhere under 15 cents per shave. Yes. I'm serious. Blades run 2 bucks per pack of 5, last about 3 shaves, with two cutting edges per blade; figure in a few pennies to buy back the razor, and we're there. Obviously a straight edged razor would be cheaper, but it require maintenance and care [honing, stropping, and alcohol based cleaning], as well as perfect technique.

2. Its far superior in shave quality compared to anything else. This will be true, but not yet for me. I still reach for the Mach'ing Bird when I need a descent shave, in a hurry. Its reliable, but not well suited for long term switching. The Mach's require more pressure as they dull, to the point its not safe. Its downright dangerous to keep that habit up with a single blade. The single blade will cut closer and flex better than 5 blades; which is the reason why Gillette went to the multi blade system: to prevent cuts on the average Joe. The position and blade angle is what determines the closeness of the shave; a razors edge is not sharper than another's [although they may hold and edge longer], and the multi blade system prevents you from changing the blade angle, and decreases the pressure you can create at any one point [the same idea as the circus actor laying on a bed of nails]. This works to minimize nicks and cuts for people with bad shaving habits. But it forces you to change blades frequently [as the edge dulls, its ineffective, and since you can't compensate to change to the proper angle, you push harder and continue dulling the edge until its a comb for crying out loud]. So the single edge forces you work with the proper pressure and angle of cut, which rewards the cleanest shave by far. This is true for safety edged and straight razors.

3. It gives me a sense of nostalgia. This is how men have shaved for about 100 years. Since the replaceable double edged safety razor was invented near the turn of the 20th century. [It was first made in 1847 and patented in 1880, but it did not become popular until Gillette won a military contract to furnish American soldiers with them in the First World War.] But for 100 years this has been the industry standard in shaving, our fathers and grandfathers had this option before any other. And, I always maintain, I should have been born in the 1930s. I love old technology, film cameras, newspapers, and fedoras. I fit right in.

So I took the plunge, bought a book for 50 cents on amazon, and bought the razor, blades, soap and brush. And here I am. 2 shaves in, and I can tell you its all about technique and practice. The zen of my life. I get lazy, I do things wrong, and I replicate it until I can't tell where the bad habits start and the good ones end. This is pretty much instant feedback. I've seen butcher shops with less blood in the sink than my first shave. OJ Simpson couldn't have made a worse mess than I did that morning. But its not about that. Zen, is about the path, not where it began, and seldom of where it leads us beyond enlightenment. My path for next portion of my life had to begin again somewhere. So it has started.

So here is a picture of my "rig" courtesy of the iPhone.

New Year, New Post

New Year, new post?

Sounds good. Except that was a month and a half ago.

I dunno. I'll get back into this at some point. I know I will. The past few months have had some major changes in my life. My grandmother died right after the new year. Which was pretty hard. To make it worse, we had the funeral on my 30th birthday. 30 was something else thats messed with me. In my head more than anything else, so far. Lastly my living situation is up. I have about 60 days to move. Since my lease is over, and my parents are departing for Detroit, forcibly, I'm on my own again, with no fall back. Knowing just HOW little money I make at M'tards, its not a simple subject.

Anyhow. I'm still here. Just seeing if the RSS is still posting out there. Look for some more soon!

Death is a fucked up concept to the living. In plain text its as about as far from the truth as it could be. Just the same though. I knew today would happen. After we got the initial dementia diagnosis about 4 years ago, and eventually the Alzheimer's like symptoms developed that followed the classic rubric of seven stages; we all knew it would happen. Today is the day my grandmother died. It happens to all of us. People get old, and they die. The living are the only ones left making sense out of someone being here one day, and not the next. But death takes more out of us than you think. The past few weeks and months had seen the pretty steady decline. Rapid. But steady. The last week or so, she was bed ridden, and comatose. From that point, it was a matter of time. All we have left in this world is time, as far as the living are concerned. Time to figure out how much time we all have left. Time to wait until we die. Time to spend in whatever way possible to prolong our thoughts about how much time remains. Alzheimer's is terrible in that respect. It takes away our concept of time. Time, place; it really doesn't mean much then. Which makes it a fucked up concept, when the rest of us all walk around, concerned about how much time, what time is it, when will this happen, type questions. Time stops with that disease. I suppose I'm doing pretty well with it. Then again, I've had the time to see this coming and prepare my thoughts about it. People ask me, why turning 30 this week bothers me. Shit like this bothers me. Its all that concept of time, and thinking you have it, that you control it, or you keep your eye on it. You can't do that forever, or even for some measure of time. Its fucked up like that. I delay certain things in my life to watch others go by; I talk about it like its fair or its not, dependent on which side of the coin you get. She had 92 years on this earth. She traveled quite a bit. Had children, grandchildren, and dogs and grand dogs. She lived through the depression, saw the second great war, and went right on through the civil rights era to the digital age. But at some point, across all time of her life, she was destined for it to stop. All of us are. She outlived the rest of her family by 25 years, a husband by 30, and saw even her youngest grandchild hit drinking age and start a phD program. Thats a lot of time well spent. But the time between now and Wednesday will probably be the hardest. Anticipating the burial process isn't it. Its realizing that I wake up the next day to turn 30. Time is a fucked up concept. Almost as much as death.

A Few Things From The Past Year

 

I thought I’d show off some more of the images I’ve taken over the past year.  Here is a brief selection.  I’m also testing out the ability to do prints from it, with a freaking cool web company.  Go Fotomoto !   So unless you view my Facebook or Twitter streams, this should all be new…

Anyhow, here’s a few of them, possibly to add more later.

 

 

 

 

Balls to the Wall…. Drug.

So without taking too much time to go over why I’m here [yet]; I’m sitting in a cheapo, nondescript motel in Wall, South Dakota. I spent most of the last two days on the road, looking at the countryside, trying to find radio stations, and thinking.  I’ve needed some time to be alone with my thoughts the past few months.  My blog has taken the punishment.  I apologize, blog.  And the 2 readers I think you still have with you. 

But I’m here.  In a town with a population of 810.  I think, I could stay here, if it didn’t get busy like it does…. Sturgeous and Badlands National Park bring crazy amounts of people here in the summer.  Now?  Now, I’m about 1 of 6 cars in this whole village, that isn’t from here. 

Badlands National Park became my battle cry the past few days.  To get here.  To hike it, to camp in it, and to photograph it.  I will fail at one and a half of those attempts. But.  Considering I never told a soul where I was going, it’s ended up just as well.  Except the temperature drop.  Except the rain.  Except that I didn’t bring all of my glass with.  Aside from that; I offer simple proof of my existence.  Me over the mountains of wet, shit, I climbed today.  Metaphorically, I’m not sure the mountain amounts to a hill of beans for me, but its been cathartic. 

Why Internet Dating Isn’t Working Out

If internet dating was a business, with would be the government subsidized, maximum benefit receiving, zero profit, kind of thing we read about in the paper that soak up tax dollars, and do literally nothing but fuzzy, feel good shit.

Its welfare, in a special line item appropriation, extended to half black-half asian, twin, teenage pregnant mothers that speak only Ugandan or Bengali, and can’t recognize shapes because of an intense lack of education by ruthless male figures in their home country.  Internet dating really just jabs its hooks into the downtrodden, the less fortunate, and the never-will’s, to pump up hope.  Hope comes at the cost of everyone else. 

My point is, that one solid month back into the internet dating realm, across 3 sites mind you, I have zero replies.  On one site alone I’ve lit off 58 messages.  Nothing.  Its false hope.  Of all the women I’ve seen online, let alone looked at more than twice, and bothered to read a profile; maybe 10% are attractive to me.  Which, honestly means there are about 10 to 40 out there.  From Minnesota to Missouri.  That’s not helping to do much else than give false hope.  Especially when none of them answer you.   Its frustrating.  Imagine walking around a party where people are talking and being introduced; and after a night of 58 attempts; not one person says “hello” back to you.  How disrespectful is that?  How is this any different, I might ask? 

I can tell you how its NOT any different.  These are not random social networking sites, where I’m hammering away trying to find a skank.  These are dating sites.  Populated by adults, that "opt in” to the service.  You would think that people going to these sites, who spend time making profiles, would probably want to converse and meet people.  I guess its not about that.  So why would you go to a social gathering, and not be social and introduce yourself, or try to meet people? I would stay at home. But I’m cruising these sites because I want that moment in my mind, where I probably aren’t alone in this world, and maybe it is a couple of mouse clicks off.

 

There are only two reasons women are even on these things. First and foremost,I think, that most of these dating sites are really just ways for women to pound their own ego higher.  Judging by the information changes, it looks like 10-15% are people in relationships that aren’t swinging.  So the max actual crowd to pick from drops to 85% of what you think it is.  That’s nice.  Again, why join a site like that?  Next, I’d say 20 to 30% are listed as bisexual.  Which means what?  Because by the time you are pushing 30; and you haven’t figured out your own orientation, you might not be ready for a relationship.  Pool size drops to 65% of expected size. Next, you figure in the number of smoking hot women, that have no intention of anything other than giving some dork an erection.  Call her “viagra,” but that on purpose.  Knock it back 10% more. Now we are at the real pool.  Half the size you think it is. 

 

This brings in the second reason women on these sites.  By and large, they are damaged goods, unattractive, or unwilling to find a date in the real world.  Seriously.  Lets not count the small group like me for now, stick with it.  If they are attractive, and normal, and even venture outside once per day; men will find them.  Bees and honey.  Shit and flies.  Ice and water. You can’t hardly get one with out the other.  But they aren’t.  Damaged goods is a big class, but refine it to say: emotionally incompatible, incomplete acceptance of past misgivings, or burdened by life circumstances.  All of it is the same category.  In the month I’ve been hitting this hard, its most of what I see in “real” women out there.  These are women that can’t do a conventional relationship…  they are too domineering or masochistic. They do not give and take in a natural way.  They focus or obsess to unfair levels about potential mates, or are just plain chock full of “father figure issues,” that aren’t fair for anyone to deal with. Not only that, this is the group that probably had a kid [or several] at 20, which didn’t turn out so great. Maybe they smoke crack still.  Who f’ing cares. Its all the same.  Defect on arrival. Send it back.  Not only that, we get the girls that self-assuredly, can’t make it work in the normal world of dating. So they put up out of focus pictures, pictures in costumes, pictures of friends, or non-personable shit as self portraits.  Anything but let the internet public see them for what they are.  Lastly, we have the ones that just are unwilling to settle for what is around them.  They are the best case scenario of all.

 

I count myself, of sorts for comparisons sake, in the last line. I get it.  I’m no male model.  I don’t have 6 pack abs, or gloss myself with nicknames.  I’m largely a bust by age 30.  I couldn’t make a regular relationship last more than 4 months on my own, and I haven’t found one female, in my life [including my own mother for shit’s sake], that genuinely enjoys spending time with me.  I know I’m a loser in the real world. So, like me, these girls are looking on the internet.  But not looking at the same time.  Frustrating for sure.  Not looking? Well no one else seems to be interested in a guy, that’s titling messages “just looking to meet people.”  Not, fuck me in the broom closet like a hooker.  Not, marry me the minute you meet me.  Not, I want to knock you around to show you how I love you.  Just looks to meet people.  I ask about their interests; if they say something funny, I mention that.  I compliment their pictures if they look good, and I relate to hobbies and interests that are common.

 

Its unfortunate.  Not only am I pathetic in the real dating world, I’m flaming out fast in the fake world of internet dating.  But, its a last ditch effort.  For months I’ve been serious about needing a real chance at a relationship.  Not a given, guaranteed thing.  But I need a fucking chance. I think I deserve it.  The fickle mob, that is my judge, denies me that, and bail. 

the return of RONRON !!

Former alderman arrested on gun charge

available online Qctimes.com

by Kurt Allemeier

A former Davenport alderman who served a troubled tenure on the city council has been charged with being a felon in possession of a firearm.

Ronald Van Fossen, 67, of 4523 S. Concord St., was charged Thursday stemming from an incident earlier in the week. He is scheduled to appear in court next on Aug. 27.

Van Fossen served one term on the council, from 2006-2008, marred by arrests for domestic abuse, a stint in alcohol rehabilitation and a sexual harassment lawsuit by a city employee that resulted in a $92,000 settlement.

It was a 2007 conviction for domestic abuse that led to the firearm charge, a court affidavit states.

Davenport police investigating his vehicle being stolen recovered it Saturday in the 2200 block of East 12th Street and found a handgun inside, the affidavit says. The next day, officers asked Van Fossen whether he owned the handgun. Van Fossen said he did.

Van Fossen appeared in court Friday. He was not booked into the Scott County Jail.

----------

RonRon, I have missed you. You and your stupid antics are what this town needs again. Get your ride ganked. Leave your gat in the front seat, and let the police find it down around 12th street. Lets see if that makes news. Bitchin' RonRon is back baby!

So Where Have I Been?

Its a fair question. I tend to run away. The hardest part about having a long term commitment with my blog. Much like a mate, my blog and I have had moments where we separate and come back together again. I think… think, that this is the initial “get back together” awkwardness that symbolizes the reconciliation. So a brief explanation of the past few weeks…

Well going back to April. The “me” part of the relationship was true this time, when I say, its not you; blog, its me. Keeping a personal narrative short, I found out that I’m diabetic. Among other things. While being diabetic itself isn’t much of anything [18 million Americans plus are diagnosed, with nearly 60 million in a pre-diabetic state], its the rest of my life, is diabetes. Confused? Its not something you take a pill for, and poof, a month later its done. Its something I can’t forget about. I’m also under going other tests at this point for other things. Here again, the point really is; I’m getting old. Period. I need to come to the understanding that I won’t live forever. Instead, mortality lies ahead of us at every turn.

Aside from that. I spent some time alone, outside of the digital world. I’ve been drifting around the swirls of my own imagination. Translate that to mean more photography and more writing. Not that either are particularly good; but I’ve made an effort to do more of it. It seems like I’ve had to spend more time focusing on my physical state, knowing that, I know I need to focus more on my mental state. Expressing things on paper and in print helps. The frustration and the underlying uncertainty of life ahead is as helpful to the process as anything else could be. Maybe more on that later. I’ve been told I should push for a Lulu.com release. Maybe.

As far as the rest of my life; its consumed with working, and hiding from the fear of myself. I’ve even avoided consuming media as much as I had been accustomed to. Netflix is happy with this decision, as are the 5 news blogs, and 6 podcasts I subscribe to. As for now, I think I’m willing to take the “pause button” off for a while. Maybe get back to a state of normalcy, if I can.

to be the best, you gotta eat the rest.

Woman aims to become world's fattest

by ninemsn staff [available online via MSN, March 15 2010]

An obese mother in the US is trying to put on weight in order to become the world's fattest woman.

Donna Simpson, from New Jersey, weighs 273kg but told the Daily Mail newspaper she had her heart set on reaching her goal weight of 1000lb (450kg) in two years.

The 42-year-old already holds the title of the world's fattest mother after giving birth to her daughter in 2007 when she weighed 241kg.

"I'd love to be 1000lb ... it might be hard though, running after my daughter keeps my weight down," Ms Simpson told the Daily Mail.

Ms Simpson, who needs a mobility scooter to go shopping, eats huge amounts of junk food each week and tries to move as little as possible so she doesn't burn off as many calories.

"I do love cakes and sweet things, doughnuts are my favourite," she said.

Ms Simpson said she also loved eating sushi and would often eat 70 big pieces in one go.

Her 49-year-old partner Philippe — who she met on a dating site for plus-size people — was encouraging her to reach her goal, she said.

"I think he'd like it if I was bigger ... he's a real belly man and completely supports me," she said.

To put on enough weight, Ms Simpson will need to eat 12,000 calories a day, which is six times the recommended daily intake for women.

In order to pay for the enormous amounts of food she is eating — her weekly grocery bill is $815 — Ms Simpson makes money by running a website where men pay to watch her consume fast food.

=================================================

this is soooo full of goodness. i cant focus.

Pappa's Got A Brand New Zombie!

James Brown's body is 'missing from its crypt', alleges singer's daughter

by Daily Mail Reporter [available online: Daily Mail, March 12 2010]

James Brown's daughter has claimed the singer's body has gone missing from its crypt.

LaRhonda Pettit, 48, alleges the body of Brown, who died in December 2006 aged 73, is being hidden to prevent a full autopsy being carried out.

Ms Pettit said the official cause of death, which was said to be a heart attack brought by pneumonia, is not the real reason behind the Godfather of Soul's passing.

Ms Pettit, who underwent a DNA test in 2007 to prove she was Brown's daughter, believes there were several people involved in Brown's death.

She said: 'My daddy's body has disappeared. I have no clue where it was taken, but I need to know where.

'I'm convinced his death was suspicious and I want the people responsible brought to justice.

'The only way to do that is to exhume his body and have an autopsy. I cannot understand why one was never conducted.'

She added to America's Globe newspaper: 'It was common knowledge that my daddy took illegal drugs.

'He was also hooked on various prescription painkillers. At the very least there were enablers who helped cause his death.'

Ms Pettit, who is 99.99 per cent likely to be Brown's daughter, said the singer had a relationship with her mother after meeting her at one of his performances in the 1960s.

She is one of 12 people who came forward following Brown's death claiming to be one of his illegitimate children.

Brown's body is said to have been sealed in a temporary crypt at his daughter Deanna's South Carolina Home while arrangements are made for his permanent burial.

--------------------------------------------------------

While the fact that James Brown is a zombie, is not news; it IS however newsworthy that Zombie James Brown is, for lack of a logical reason, out on a zombie binge and can not be caught dead... ALIVE in his temporary crypt. Which is at his daughters home. Thats been there since 2006. Begging the question, what really is temporary anymore? Not even death. Not when you are Zombie James Brown, and you feel GOOD!

Last Day

Stuck eating McDonalds. The BBQ place had a 20min wait. But now I'm
waiting atleast 20 mins for my connection flight to Moline. Something
er other about crew members flights being delayed, delaying the flight
docked in our gate, meanin we can't dock and load. Sigh.

Last Day

DFW here I am. Taxing around the place takes 12 minutes. Is that
pathetic. I thought these things could fly, and here we are rolling
around at ghetto block cruiser limp speed. Sigh. Only one flight
left... To the Mo-line.

Last Day

First leg of the homeward flight is on time. It's the fastest I've
ever made it through TSA. By far. No inspections. No bullshit. Maybe
I'm off the black list!?!?!? DFW here we go.

Last day

5:00 am and I'm ridin the gray goose back to the airport. I really
don't want to leave. It's about 50 degrees here. I'm heading into 3
degrees as a high with 4 inches of fresh snow since I left. Thanks Iowa.

Day 4 -- Part 4

Dinner, with car valleted, was at a brazillian steakhouse. Meat is
all you can eat, brought to your table and carved off every 3 mins or
so. 16 different meats to pick. Soooooo good. I'm glad I didn't eat
all day. The bill? Eesh. 3 people with one mixed drink each was 225
bones. Ouch. I spend less on groceries per MONTH in Iowa. Sooo
good. Zo got caught dancing with the breasty belly dancer. I got
pulled up later. Good times. Good mojito. Great meat. Then we hit
up the Hyatt. It's 40 stories tall, highest in San Diego, and has a
bar at the top with a view to kill for over the harbor. Drinks and
stories. What a way to end the trip. 4 am wake up call hurt after
this!

Day 4 -- Part 3

One last shot of my hotel courtyard at dusk. Then on my way to change
and head out for one last night!

Day 4 -- Part 2

Drove down to the border. Couldn't cross. No passport. So I saw
thebazaar on the American side and the two massive outlet malls. The
bazaar is straight out of Mexico. Kids walking a chiuaua in the
street. Knock off designer shit. Worth the drive. Stopped to see
Lo's restaraunt on the way up. Also drove in the country through
horse ranch territory.

Day 5-- part 1

Started out the day at the Kobye Swap meet. Or aka. San diegos
largest roving trash dump errrr garage sale. Admission was 50 cents.
Found some stuff. Like a donkey party. Too bad the one I wanted to
see only plays in Mexico.